Q: What did the littl boy with cancer get for christmas? A: Nothing, he didnt make it that far.

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Why is it a bad idea to stand in a thunder and lightning storm with a metal rod? Because you will get wet from the rain.

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"Doctor, Doctor! I feel like I'm a dinner roll!" Yes, well that's a side effect of your brain cancer.

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Why did Julie fall off a swing? 'Cause she had no hands. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Julie, that's certain.

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What did the little boy with cancer say right before he died? Nothing. He was very sick, and could not speak during the last few weeks of his life.

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Q: What do you call a girl with no arms or legs, is blind, has no parents, has cancer, and is dyslexic? A: Suzie

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What do you call one lawyer shot dead in the street? Ghandi.

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Little Timmy walks up to the teacher during class and asks "Can i use the restroom?" The teacher says "I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy says "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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3 men of different races walk into a bar. The bartender then proceeds to ask, "what would you 3 men like?"

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A Jew, an Irishman and a Russian walk into the bar and the bartender says, "Get the Hell out."

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Roses are Red. Violets are Blue. But Roses can also be White. And Violets should be Purple

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when do you know your a BOSS................ when you get a promotion

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Y u do dis?

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Coldpaly is a good band

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like peanut butter Can you fly?

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Why did the middle-aged black man lose his job? Because in this day in age, many businesses are being forced to lower their pay-roll, and he could no longer be afforded.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas ? Cancer

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what did the lesbian do with the other lesbian? played badminton

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What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a Cheetah? A yellow Chuck Norris with black spots.

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Two baby seals walk into a club.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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You know what's bad? Running over a baby with a truck. You know what's worse? Skidding on it.

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Why did the man with no arms fall of his bike? Someone threw a washing machine at him

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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