How are a duck and a bicycle the same? They both have handlebars. Except the duck.

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Three a man is trapped on a desert island and a genie offers to grant him one wish. The man accepts the existence of the genie and then wishes for unlimited wishes for the rest of his life. The man takes over the world.

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Knock knock! Whose there? ... The person who was knocking suffered a fatal shot to the back of the head by a drive by shooter, if the person at the door had just opened it, instead whose there? (...which no one does anyways...) The knocker may have survived. He had a wife and 5 kids, 3 Grandkids.

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i read the terms of service when i posted this

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What do dogs and cats have in common? They eat dog food, accept for the cat.

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2 black guys are riding in a car, whos driving? The cops.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was an animal of minimal intelligence and didn't know of the underlining risks involved in crossing a high speed passage for cars and other road baring vehicles, the presence of the chicken in the road also prompted further danger for the drivers involved in the situation. This resulted ultimately in not only the death of the chicken in hand, but also caused two cars, one with a male driver aged 35 and the other with a female driver aged 42 and her two children, to collide. This cost hundreds of pounds in damage for the male driver, who escaped with minor injuries, and the death of one of the woman's children. The whole event was an unnecessary disaster.

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Call me Mr. Flinstone, for that is my surname.

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George Michael walks into a bathrom.....

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A woman gets in her car to drive.

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Why don't seagulls fly over the bay? They do. In fact, seagulls can be found near almost any body of water.

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How many Jews does it take to change a lightbulb? 1, just because their Jewish doesn't mean their incapable of changing a lightbulb.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I don't fucking know.

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What did the man say when he was hit with a flying watermelon? Ouch.

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25

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Why does Kony kidnap infants? To create an Infantry

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69 :) 3====D:). [{}]:)

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That awkwad moment when a homeless man runs naked around a golf cource yelling hears the 19th hole bitches.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

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What do you call said black man flying an airplane? A pilot.

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An Amish walks into Best Buy

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Who are you?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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