A bear just broke into my house and im scared…...... Oh wait thats just my 350 pound teacher… now i'm even scareder

You know what is funny about r.ape? Nothing. It's horror

There once was a man from Nantucket Who got his head stuck in a bucket He yanked and he yowled, he hollered and howled, Then gave up and grumbled, "Aw, I guess I'll have to go to the doctor."

What do you call a white woman that had sex with a black guy? A rape victim.

What did the runner say after he ran 10 miles? I just ran 10 miles.

What does does an elephant and a grape have in common? They are both grapes except for the elephant.

A women in her kitchen hears a thud outside. Her husband fell off the roof.

PENIS

Two muffins are baking in an oven. One turns to the other and says, "Boy, it sure is hot in here!" The other one replies, "OMG, A TALKING MUFFIN!"

whats blue and fluffy? blue fluff.

What did God say when he made his first black guy? Oh no I burned one! :)

A straight A star quarterback in his senior year of high school was about to throw the game winning pass in his season's last game and complete the school's undefeated record when he was sacked by a defender. He fell incorrectly and broke both of his legs, rendering all of his scholarships invalid. He hasn't walked since.

Yo momma is so stupid, she has no job, five kids, and six weeks to live, due to the fact she spent all her money on cigarettes and now has lung cancer.

Why did the man soil himself at his daughters wedding? Because he has an enlarged prostate and has trouble sitting down for long periods of time.

A hipster walks into a bar you've never heard of...

One day 2 people were gonna fight after school and the final bell wrung then they started the mtch and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing that you say when you don't want to fight and ypu let the other person win?" The other guy says, "I give up?" Then the challenger says, " I WIN!!!"

Why'd the duck cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The duck.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? I don't know. He couldn't open it.

what is the biggest lie in the universe? -click to enter only if you are 18

hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

Roses are red... Violets are blue... Unless your colour blind.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

how do u get to your favorite chinese restaurant? wok.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...