GUYS! I GOT AN A IN MY PIANO EXAM!!!!!

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#Last Christmas I gave you my heart #And as far as I know #The transplant was a complete sucess #And you have recovered from your operation #And are now well again #This year to save me from tears #I'll donate my kidneys

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The teacher hands out tests to the students and some of the students say to the teacher "what does 'no grade' mean?" The teacher responds, "Oh I need to grade them still.")

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Hey, I just met you And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey, I just met you

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Yo mama is so fat, she's bigger than a whale. I have two fathers.

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Why did the girl say 'baa'? Because she was a lamb.

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Q:So there's a black guy and a mexican sitting in a car...who's driving? A: The Cop

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What did johanne buy when she got pregnant? A staircase

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How many licks did it take for the owl to get to the center of the tootsie roll tootsie pop? A: Since when did owls have tounges?

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How many blondes can you fit in a car? About 5 if you lift the arm rest.

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The hippo's an African beast, Who notably is quite obese, Quite boorish and mean And never too lean And poops in the rivers, at least...

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Q: Why are there no tablets in the jungle? A: The pharmaceutical logistics involved would be enormous and would make very little business sense.

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Why did the blonde go to McDonald's ? Because she was hungry.

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a duck walked into the 7-11, grabbed a slurpee and told the man at the register, "put it on my bill". But the man behind the counter was Indian, and could not understand what the duck was saying. The duck then walked out confused, wondering why he was buying a slurpee in the first place

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Run it over with a lawn mower!

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A Rabi, a priest, and a monk all go to different churches because they all have different beliefs an respect each others decisions.

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What do you call an asian woman with one leg? By her name.

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yo mamma's so fat she's fat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Roses aren't blue Violets aren't red She was my ex wife But now she's just dead.

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Why did Michael Jackson become white? Because he likes to molest children.

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what is the difference between a Ferrari and a bucket of dead babies......... I dont have a Ferrari in my garage

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What happens when you tickle a rabid iguana? It bites you and you die.

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Q- Why? A- Why not?

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Why was the little girl not allowed to see the pirate movie? It was sold out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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