Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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I milked the cow, but no gas came out.

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I went to the doctor & he gave only 6 months to live. I told him I couldn't pay my bill, he said "that doesn't change the fact you're going to die soon."

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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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why did the boy eat his lunch money? it was his lunch!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am staraiL so dont touch me!!!!!

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Why was Adam sad? His wife found him cheating with several women which led to a lengthy and messy divorce and him losing custody of his two children and his house.

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What's worse than an empty bottle of Yoohoo? Literally nothing.

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How are Steve Jobs and the iPhone similar? They both keep getting thinner as time goes on.

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What did the man say to the really attractive woman? We are different genders

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What do you call a white guy pointing a gun at someone? A member of the United States Army.

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Hurr durr, I shit my pants.

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Why did they name the team mavericks and why Was the maskot a horse? Because 50 years ago they found a blue horse And its name was maverick

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One day an Indian boy asked his father why they have such long names? The dad answered him in a such a simple and concise way, that the little boy understood.

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Your mother is so stupid that she was tested and proved to be mentally retarded.

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i have a black person in my family tree he is still hanging

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Roses are red violets are blue vodka cost less than dinner for two

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Why did the blond fall down? She died.

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No one walks into a bar. It is closed.

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whats up with that? i'm from jersy

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Roses are shitty Violets are bitches I'm fat.

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Hey I Just Met You , And This is Crazy But Don't Text. My Phone Cuz You Stalk Me Daily #Taste_MyCarmel

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Do you believe in magic? cuz i do.

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What's something 9/10 people enjoy? A gang rape.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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