Cover myself in Vaseline and cry in the dark for 4, maybe 5 hours with or without a wooden splintery dildo in my arse..”

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Q: Why did Katie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms.. Q: Why didn't she have any arms? A: 50. Cal... Q: Wait where'd she go? A: I don't know there's a helicopter in my scop- wait what the f**k is going on?.... TO: CoD 4 Players -Ap

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What do you call a dolphin that drives a Mercedes Benz? Nothing. Dolphins can't drive.

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An englishman, irish-man and a scotsman walk into a bar. Englishman orderds a pint of becks, Irishman a guiness and the Scot a whiskey. Everything is absolutely fine and nothing of even remote interest happens.

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a priest, a rabbi, and a nun walk into a bar...and the bartender goes...what is this a joke? mr. healey

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"Mommy! Look, I found a turtle!" "that's no turtle." "Oh..."

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If you dumb fooks keep swearing we are going to get banned.

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varför skriver jag på svenska jag vet inte

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have you ever seen an elephant hiding behind a flower? No? well it must have been hiding pretty well.

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Someone stopped playing Skyrim.

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Once you buy it, you will get a 365 day warranty or a 1 year warranty, whichever comes first

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what smelss like crap.... CRAP dose DUH

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why did the girl fall of the swing someone threw a refrigerator at her

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If a hen lays an egg in the middle of a roof, which way would it fall? To the east, as there was a brisk wind in that direction.

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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your mama so dumb her iq point is below average

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What did my wife say when I asked her to pick up some milk on her way home from work? OK

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a kangaroo walks in to a bar and sits down. Kangaroo's live in Auustralia

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your pear.

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i see trees are green, Roses are red, Violets are blue and i think to myself What a Wonderful World

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Why is an Orange, Orange??? Because its not blue!

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roses are red violets are blue you think shes hot? how BLIND are you?

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Why does batman wear a mask? Because if he didn't every enemy would know who he was, go to his house a brutally murder him.

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A: Knock Knock (waits for an answer) oh there's no one in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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