What do you call a pair of owls? Two owls.

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A woman asked me today if I'd ever tried crazy golf. I hadn't actually ever tried it.... So I replied "no".

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Luke, I am your father... Uh... Okay, thats chill, so uh, is my last name Vader or somthing? No son, my name is Anakin Skyw... NOOOOOOOOOOO THATS IMPOSSIBLE!

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the only thing i learned in geometry is when you push two circles together it makes a titty venn diagram

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What's funnier than 10 dead babies? 11 dead babies.

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Bryce Harlan and I are close friends Love, Pete K

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Q: What happens when your name is Gretchen Wieners? A: Nothing. your last name is a male sex organ

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The battle of Troy lasted approximatley nine years.

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Did you hear the joke about the butter? No.

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Yo mama's so fat she got baptized in Sea World.

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Why couldn't the married couple have sex? They were lesbians who were saving up a sex change.

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a young mother calf named near reality was milking itself and selling it at pathmark everyday for high prices he got a lot of money out of it and bought a big mansion where he also had a farm and collected prize show cows to show off to all of his cow friends.... he also bought gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons of prize show cow milk to drink to and build up energy for the cow show race coming up in the near fall. Every sunset he buys loads of milk to drink and feed his plants with. He plants lots of grass every day to eat and produce high quality milk goods. He was a wii, ps3, and xbox360 to play everyday and excercise his udder milk.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Inform her that she is an illegitimate child resulting from a vicious, torturous rape and that her mother will never truly love her.

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What do Muslims have for breakfast? Corn Flakes.

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You want to hear a joke. Sure. A black president. Oh wait...

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What do you call a banana in a blender? A banana in a blender. Duh

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Where did Adolf go as a vacation after the war? Hell

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Why did the squirrel across the river upside down? So it could keep its nuts dry.

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Why isn't the dog a rebublican? Because it's a dog.

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A kid asks his mom: "Mom, what would I be when I grow up?" And so his mother answers: "You won't grow up, you have cancer"

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A strange man knocks at the door He's your son

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What did the rabbi say to the bartender? Hi, Mark!

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A man came home from work and said to his wife im going to kill u

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A cow walks into the butcher shop, he looks around then mourns the loss of his brothers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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