What did goldilocks say to the three bears? she was savagely murdered before she could say anything.

Why doesnt snow like Asians? Snow is a form of precipitation within the Earth's atmosphere in the form of crystalline water ice, consisting of a multitude of snowflakes that fall from clouds. Since snow is composed of small ice particles, it is a granular material. It has an open and therefore soft structure, unless packed by external pressure. Snowflakes come in a variety of sizes and shapes. Types which fall in the form of a ball due to melting and refreezing, rather than a flake, are known as graupel, ice pellets or snow grains. Therefore since snow is unhuman they are then thus incapable of emotions because they lack any vitals organs.

Why we in a Falln tank!!!? Be cause the plane exploded!!!!!!!

What did Robin say to Justin Beiber? You're gay. Angus L.

What did the hammer say to the drill? Nothing, they don't talk stupid.

Why Did the man Commit suicide? His body used cellular respiration to make ATP (A form of energy) and his body used it to send electrical signals to his index finger to pull the trigger on his .357 Magnum, thus putting a bullet through the soft tissue in his brain causing his body to shut down Imediately!

Two guys walk into a bar.

Why couldn't my grandpa use a cell phone? He didn't have hands.

How do you make a black man sad? You kill and mutilate his family maliciously

What is better than a car made of gold? Anything you consider to be better than a car made of gold.

you know your just like my pinkie toe........eventually i am going to bang you on a table

Gay rights

womens rights

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Q: What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? A: Ten babies nailed to eleven trees.

how do you make a cat get out of a tree you shot it

why couldn't the one armed man juggle because it was snowing outside and his one room flat was to small

a black guy walks into a bar and sits next to a white guy. White guy: "I don't like your kind here". Black guy: "what kind wound that be"? White guy: "the colored kind". The black guy turns away then looks back at the white guy and says", When I'm born I'm black, when I die I'm black, When I'm cold I'm black, and when I'm sick I'm black. You ( to the white guy ) when your born your pink, when you die your blue, when your cold your purple, and when your sick your green and your calling me colored???

whats worse than getting raped by your mom getrting raped by a giant scorpian

Why do girls swim naked in lakes and oceans? so they have an excuse why their pussies smell like either tuna or cat fish.

Roses Are red violets are blue I HAVE FIVE FINGERS THE MIDDLE IS FOR U

What did the woman say when she didn't finish her meal? Can I get a to go box

A man and woman was sitting at a bar. The man bought the woman a roofied drink and she has never been seen again.

I love you.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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