Soooo... a black man walked into a bar and asked the bartender for a beer.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

pickles are green infection is yellow all the girls i know call me a good fellow

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did the monk say to the 1 legged, Asian prostitute Nothing, Monks take a vow of silence.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Whats worse than cutting yourself with scissors? Being forced into a blender by your baby's ghost.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why didn't Rosa Parks get her fat black ass up? Because she was an avid partier and had anal with roughly 8 different guys the night before.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's silent but deadly? Limnic Eruption.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the kid kid have no arms? A clown came and chopped them off.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why do aliens listen to relaxing music while they have sex? They like to cum in peace. \m/

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what did the white singer say to the black rapper? I would like to do a song with you seeing as how we have 2 separate audience types i believe this would prove the song to be successful

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's the best way to win a race? Run faster than all other participants.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Say you are caught in a net with 10 other people in said net at a construction site. A pair of scissors are right next to you and everyone said to use the scissors. But instead of using the scissors, you use your teeth in risk of a broken tooth.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

There's two blondes a black man and a camera man...

thumb_up thumb_down -15

why are black people so good at basketball? Because they can shoot steal and run and they keep brass knuckles in there waste band.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

whos best at KS3 irish and is sexy? tiarnan i lied about the sexy part

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Justin Bieber.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

how many pancakes does it take to build a dog house? none boats don't have wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Two muffins are sitting in an oven they say nothing to eachother because they are muffins and cannot speak if they did they would most likely be taken by the US government and studied and assumed to be alien life forms but anyway the muffins were taken out later and presumably eaten

thumb_up thumb_down +10

An Irish man walks into a bar. He then sits down and enjoys his favorite drink.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q. What happened first The Tree or The Apple. A. Johny Appleseed.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How do you get an Asian man to build you a computer? Pay him a reasonable amount of money

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How does a man with no arms and legs get to your door. After asking his name please help us out with this question

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops