What's long, hard, and full of semen? a penis.

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An owl and a squirrel where siting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl then turned to the squirrel and said nothing... cos owls can't talk. The owl then eats the bird because it is a bird of prey

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How do you get a clown to shut up? Hit him in the face with an axe

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How many black teachers does it take to figure out 10 x 30. only one shes a very respected teacher

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The awkward when you didn't actually say moment.

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what do you call a bee that makes milk? A BOObee

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Roses are red. I f***** a dude. you're a failed abortion. I never loved you.

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What do you get when you stab Al with a sword? At

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What does the gay man do while he is taking a shower with many other men in a prison or a gym? Lathers soap all over his body to clean himself so he is not smelly.

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Man: Did It Hurt Woman: Did what hurt? Man: When your legs were crushed after being run over by that semi

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Why Oscar lives with elephants in a zoo ? Because he's an elephant.

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Why do people eat babies? Because they're delicious.

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Jacob Edwards has friends

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Yo momma's so fat, that she was put in this joke

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Why did the Salesman leave the leper colony? He had to wish his daughter a happy birthday.

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A blonde walks out of a hair salon She had just dyed her hair.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? *cause 7 8 9? NO cause 7 was a n**ga!

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Name three similarities between racism and sexism I, S and M

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A Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian walk into a bar... They then sit down and discuss the various political factors driving a wedge between unity, harmony and understanding between their religions. They resolve that despite the differences in religious belief, they truly can coexist, and decide to pursue peace among one another and the rest of society.

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no pen = no studying no studying = bad grades bad grades = no job no job = no money no money = no food no food = death DON'T LOSE YOUR PEN

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whats big fat round and bounces on the ground? a ball and your mum

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change the bulb, one to suck my dick!

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What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

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Friend: how obsessed are you with harry potter on a scale from 1-10 Me: 9 and 3/4

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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