Did you hear about the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13 for sexual content/nudity, language, and some violence.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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What has seven ears, four legs and two arms? Nothing.

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So two Jews walk into a bar... Its nice that they take missionary work to new heights

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Why are so many children obese? Because they eat to much and they are not physically active enough

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Why did the pig have a band-aid? Because he had a whole in his foot.

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Why didn't little Billy cross the road? He was dead.

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What do you get when you pull down your pants in public? Most likely a criminal record for indecent exposure.

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I would piss if alex berry had aids n died

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What name does Steve Bartman go by Now? Steve Bartman, but he just hides all day trying not to be killed.

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Q: whats the difference between a t.v and a dead baby? A: i don't have a t.v in my garage

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He do you get an emo kid to stop cutting himself? Take away his knife.

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funniest joke ever!!!!!.....chris.

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Why was Rosa Parks forced to sit in the back of the bus? Rebecca Black decided to sit in the front.

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One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Q.What happens when Torres scores A. He doesn't

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How do you keep Helen Keller distracted? Find a stimulating device that blind and deaf people can operate correctly.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

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WHY DO JEWS HATE GERMANY? THEY DON'T THEY FORGAVE THE NAZIS :-) ( . )( . ) -------

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What happens when you go from a jew to a penguin? A huge climate change.

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How many gun shots does it take to kill you? 1..2... 3...4... Samantha reapeatedly kept shooting her enemy until she noticed that her enemy was Chuck Norris. So how many gunshots does it take to kill Chuck Norris? The world may never know.

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knock know. who there?.............. whose there?.........whose there!?!?! damn kids

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Q: What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A: "Get in the car."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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