I need to start studying.

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My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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Q. How can you tell if a snake bites? A. It depends on if he walks to school or carries his lunch.

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Three blondes were stuck on an island, one of them wished for a motorboat, later on they all died of starvation

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how doyou wake up lady gaga youu poke er face

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What did the pedophile get for christmas? He was raped by a gorilla

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Your momma is so old, it's just irresponsible of her not to have regular doctor appointments. Health should always come first.

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If a tree falls down in the forest and no one is around to hear it, does God exist?

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If a quiz is also referred to as a quizzicle, then what is a test also referred to as? A test, really. There are no synonyms for 'test' which would result in a humorous punchline; 'exam,' 'essay' and 'evaluation' are the closest possible answers and none of them provide humor at all.

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Why did the pumpkin when orange is not a letter in Spanish? Because moon shoes are der milf

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roses are red violets are blue your mum is a whore as are you:)

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A) why did the black guy leave the bar B) cause he was tired and wanted to go home

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Why did the tomato blush? It didn't - red is the natural colour for ripe tomatoes.

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what's worse then death? finding that your adopted, no one loves you and you mother raped you at the tender age of five.

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Do you know what a zombie smells like? Death

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What did the hungry man do? He ate.

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Why did a kid throw a clock out the window? Because he was adopted

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Ehh

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Before Marriage: Boy: Ah at last. I can hardly wait. Girl: Do you want me to leave? Boy: No don't even think about it. Girl: Do you love me? Boy: Of Course. Always have and always will. Girl: Have you ever cheated on me? Boy: Never. Why are you even asking? Girl: Will you kiss me? Boy: Every chance I get. Girl: Will you hit me? Boy: Hell no. Are you crazy? Girl: Can I trust you? Boy: Yes. Girl: Darling! After Marriage: (Read from bottom to top)

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What do you call a Mexican flying a plane from Mexico City to Los Angeles? A pilot you racist.

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How many people does it take to eat an apple ? One, unless it is divided into pieces for everyone to enjoy.

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What do you call a man with no friends? Terry

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her with a knife.

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Can you get me a stapler,but make sure it has staples or else I won't be able to staple anything

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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