Q: Where do zombies shop? A: Zombercrombie.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did Batman say to Robin just before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Your dad got tired while running, so he stopped running.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the chicken cross the road? No reason.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What happened when Susie fell off the Ferris Wheel? There was an open seat.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can't talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it's a bird of prey.

thumb_up thumb_down +2,204

Whats brown, large, thick, and sticky? a stick

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the man commit a serious crime? Because he couldn't think of any funny crimes.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A small boy called peter got stuck up a tree, a man walks past and said "how did you get up there?" peter replies "i fell"

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What would you do for a klondike bar? I'm allergic to milk.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the chicken cross the road? To try to go to heaven because his girlfriend Margaret was cooked into chicken sandwhiches, and he had no kids and he didn't want to marry someone else, so he tried to get ran over but no cars hit him so he cooked himself. AND so he became KFC-Style chicken wings. BUUUT since no one ate them, he grabbed them up from heaven and commented on how delicious he was and proceeded to eat more and then exploded, sending him to heaven's heaven. But it was just a dream. And Margaret had to do laundry some more today because he freaking caused a urine tsunami. You're welcome.

thumb_up thumb_down

hi

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why was the boy sad because he had a cat stapled to his face

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What is the name of the car? What

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Roses are red Violets are blue Faces like yours being in a zoo But don't worry I'll be there too Behind the bars, laughing at you

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Where do you send a Jew with ADD? A concentration camp.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

a man walks in to a night club he can not danse so he just wachis pepol

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was the little girl sad? She had a grown man sexually assault her.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's the opposite of Christopher Reeves? Reeves Christopher

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q:What happens when a bug walks into a bar A:It gets stepped on

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why did Dumbledore fall off the astronomy tower? Because Snape killed him.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

The Juice where prosecuted by many time.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops