My aunt said slow and steady wins the race, she died in a fire.

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You thought i'd be telling you a joke. Turns out im not.. !! haha

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Why did the semen cross the road? Because i put on the wrong socks this morning

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How do you know if you're gay? You find yourself sleeping with people of the same sex.

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mommy mommy! why are we pushing the car over the cliff?! the mom answers shhh youll wake your father...

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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Ask me if I am an orange. "Are you an orange?" No.

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Why did the penis rape the vagina, because it felt good!

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There's two sausages in a pan.. One says "Wow it's hot in here" The other says... "agrhhh a talking sausage"

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What's worse than going in the wrong direkshun? ...My spelling

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What did the scarf say to the hat? Nothing, a scarf can't talk.

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The women if the wnba are good at basketball

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what do you get when you have unprotected sex with a hooker? an orgasm

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Once, one man had a horse. And the horse had nothing against it

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What did a fireman say to his wife right after they got ran over by a stampede of bulls? nothing.... they were dead.

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Confucius says, I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.

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why didn't the unicorn have a horn? It was a horse. Why didn't the horse have a horn? it was not a unicorn.

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Can you say the word "toy boat" 10 times fast? No

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Why is Eeyore in Winnie the Pooh always sad? Cause he has a nail in his anus

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Nickleback walks into a bar..... There isn't a punchline because ruining music isn't funny.

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DON'T expect the unexpected, you don't want to KILL the unexpected ;-)

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Did you hear about the guy with seven fingers? You should, because almost everybody has seven fingers.

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whats the differance between a orange and a dead baby one is a delicious treat the other is a fruit

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You ever notice when geese fly in a V there is one line that is always longer than the other? Do you know why that is? Because there are more geese in that line.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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