What's the difference between a live baby and a dead baby? A dead baby doesn't cry.

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Have you seen the flock of birds? probably not because they hit a window and all died at impact.

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whats helen kellers favorite activity fingering herself

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I hear Lebron has a new phone. He has it on silent all the time. It's because he doesn't want to disturb anyone around him while they prepare for important games in which he will be an indispensable part of, especially during the 4th quarters of the NBA Finals.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a penis and a knife choose which one goes in you.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Whose there? Obviously not Suzie.

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What Do You Call a Hawk in Virginia? A Hawk What Do you Call a Hawk that lives in Virginia? Virginan Hawk

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Yo momma so Fat that she got picked for the Olympic Swim Team

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How do you make a miner sad? You cut his d*ck off then feed it to his family.

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What's the difference between a plum and an elephant? They're both purple except for the elephant.

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How do you kill a down-syndrome kid? fire.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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What's black, blue, and red all over? A baby after I kill it

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This is no joke. Well, I did warn you.

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Straight man: Gays can't have babies so they shouldn't be allowed to have sex. Gay man: But you got a vasectomy last year, so you can't make babies either. The straight man sees the irony, realizes how judgmental he has been and never has sex again because he maintains his opinion that gays shouldn't have sex.

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In Soviet Russia, the government kills with famine and genocide.

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What's the worst place to land when parachuting off an airplane? A. In the middle of an ocean B. In a war zone C. Inside an active volcano D. In a justin beiber concert

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Roses Are Red Violits Are Blue Screw it RUN!!

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there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

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What is worse than getting hit by a car? Getting hit by a truck

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"Hey dude, wanna come with me??" "Sure! Where????" "On your face"

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Stolen.

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How do you get a blond to fall over? Shoot her with a shotgun.

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Ring ring yes.This is doctor steve and we got our test results and it seems that you'r son has butinites and you'r kind sytoms are nothing because he is just an ass.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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