A man walked into a bar. It was closed, so I don't see how this was possible.

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verry nice how mUCH?

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What's your middle name? (Interrupt them) It doesn't matter what your middle name is! What does deduce mean? Fall down the stairs.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's green and shitty? A bootleg stick.

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A black man walks into a bar with a monkey on his shoulder. The bartender asks "Where did you get that?" The monkey replies "Africa, there are thousands of them."

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and Santa Claus are on a plane. This is impossible because Santa Claus does not exist.

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Why did the blonde make pasta even though she had a gluten allergy? She had some Italian friends coming over. Also she bought some gluten-free pasta and sauce so she wouldn't need to be hospitalized.

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Think about this. I am lying to you right now.

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Why was the Chinese man so sad? He's Asian.

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A man walks into a bar and wakes up in the hospital with a mild concussion.

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What did the white man say to the muslim? Hi

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The Irishman walked out of the bad.. Haha just kidding

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What do apples and black men both have in common? They are both people except for the apple

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Ahmed walks into Abbar.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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There once were two muffins in an oven, and one definitely did not start talking to the other

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Why did to plane crash because the pilot was a tomato

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What's so funny about a heart attack? It's not kidney failure..

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Why did little Billy fall of his bike? anwser: because a refridgator hit him.

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When life gives you lemons you are like "how did I get these lemons?"

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A black man logs on to facebook. He checks his news feed then logs off

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whats green and has wheels? grass i lied about the wheels

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How did the leukemia patient die? He was shot in the leg repeatedly until he died of blood loss.

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Why doesnt a chicken wear pants? Because its pecker is on his head.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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