your face.

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roses are red violets are blue i have aids and so do you happy valentines day!

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm terrible at poems. Potato.

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Why don't elephants smoke? Because they would be afraid of the fire, and they are much more adversely affected by recreational drugs than humans are.

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what do you call a 19th century steam train driver ? i dont know , depends what his mother named him

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Three blokes walk into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability.

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a jew? A pizza does'nt scream in the oven

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A burglar broke into a house one night. He picked up a CD player to place in his sack and a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark, saying, "Jesus is watching you." He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more, he shook his head, clicked the light on, and began searching for more valuables. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, he heard, "Jesus is watching you." Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. "Did you say that?" he hissed at the parrot "Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you." The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?" "Moses," replied the bird. "Moses?" the burglar laughed. "What kind of people would name a bird Moses?" "Devout Semites," the parrot replied.

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A rabbi, a priest, and a minister walk into a bar. Unfortunately, the bar was closed due to the poor economy. Luckily there was an Applebee's across the street and they were able to save money with half-priced appetizers.

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Why'd jimmy drop his candy wrapper? He was brutally melested and stabbed I the eyeballs with forks and cut into pieces before he could make it to the trash can. He was then thrown into the trash can he was going to.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? ..... 7

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Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead!!!!

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Knock Knock -Who's there? No one -Ok

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What did one barstool say to the other? Nothing, inanimate objects cannot talk.

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Why did the prestigious college accept the Native American student? Trick question, Native Americans don't exist anymore.

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Did you hear about the deer? He had antlers. If antlers where a kind of disease, that would be a pun.

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What did the sheep say when he broke a leg? Nothing, sheeps can't talk.

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What do a goat and an eagle have in common? They both can fly, except for the goat.

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Whats better than seeing a worm in your apple... Reading the the next anti-joke.

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Why are anti jokes so funny? Because their not.

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I am a n1gger.

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A dead guy walks into a grave.

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when debbie meets downer

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker face pa pa poker face!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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