A white guy, a black guy, and a spanish guy jump off a building. They all die on impact and their families mourn their loss for years to come.

How do you get a clown off of a swing? Hit him with an axe

Today I decided to burn alot of calories. So I found a fat kid and lit him on fire.

Why didn't Jesus like pizza? Because he didn't exist.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well, it's really nice.

And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.


If life throws you melons, you might be dyslexic.

what did the plane say to the trade center on 9/11 boom

Three blind mice walk into a pub. They are all unaware of their surroundings, so to derive humor from it would be exploitative.

Do you know what's the difference between a bicycle and a black man? A bicycle is an object and a black man is a human being.

i like boobs haha ha hahaha

A seal walks into a club.

Try this on someone... go up and say "Ive got a great knock knock joke for you but you have to start" there response "Ok, knock knock" you say "Who's there?" They are usually dumbfounded and a hilarious awkward silence ensues

What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side

What's funnier than a pile of dead babies? Just about anything because child mortality is not funny.

A dog walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender goes to get him a drink, but then realizes how ridiculous this is and wakes up from his dream. He rolls over to tell his wife about it, but she ignores him. He begins to cry silently, realizing his marriage is in shambles.

A Christian and an Atheist are in a bar, the christian says "if you don't believe in god you will go to hell." the atheist replies "if there was a benevolent supreme being, logic dictates that there would be proof of his existence other than a 2,000 year old book." they agree to set aside their petty differences and get on with their lives.

Your mom is so fat that when she dives into a pool she displaces a proportionately larger volume of water than people with less body mass.

Why did the blond get fired from the M&M factory? Repeated absences and stealing.

What do u call an anorexic with a yeast infection? -a quarter pounder with cheese. (not really anti-joke, im a girl and thought this was funny lol)

A platypus walks into a bar. They are the only mammals with the ability to lay an egg.

Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They finally get to Florida and they see a sign that says "Disneyworld: left" so they take the left and have a wonderful time at what many people believe to be the most magical place on Earth.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!


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