Why did the jew go into the gas chamber? Because he thought he was going to get a shower.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

<=3 penis

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Roses are red, Violets are purple, nothing rhymes with purple.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Your mum. Your mum who? Dinner is ready, come down stairs.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How do you know if a girl is special? If she hates justin bieber, Twilight, and is open to threeways.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What does a pelican and a taxman have in common? Both are bipedal, both are carbon-based lifeforms that procreate by DNA replication, both in all probablility eat fish, both have survival instinct, both require fresh water for hydration, both have five senses; vision, hearing, touch, taste and smell, both are capable of at least limited cognition, and both can turn aggressive when provoked.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q: Ask me if I read the terms of use before I submitted this joke. A: I didnt

thumb_up thumb_down -14

One day a man was really horny and wanted to bang his wife that night, so he took soom horns and banged them against her skull until his wife bled to death. He was later sentenced for homocide and to this day has been in prison

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Get on your knees Ho

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did suzie do when she dropped her cookie? She died because it was secretly a bomb

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you cripple a fireman? You push him down the stairs.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the yeti make an omlette? To practise making omlettes.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

holly shit!!!! when did i get on the internet !?

thumb_up thumb_down -16

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? No-one because that's not feasible.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Whats worse than getting raped by a cow? Getting raped by two cows.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's the difference between an elephant and a Jew. The elephant has elephant cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

the doctor says to the patient " i have some good news and some bad news" the patient says well what is it dock " well the good news is your fine " the patient asked what the bad news was and the doctor said " i lied about you being fine you have aids, and testicular cancer and you have 2 days to live"

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q:Why did the chicken cross the road A:He didn't he was tortured then killed and turned into a sandwich that you can buy for the price of $1.00

thumb_up thumb_down -16

why did the blind man crash his car? he had down syndrome.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

The only difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer is the taste.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A man walks into a bar. He is then rushed to the emergency room for severe blunt force trauma to the head and multiple cranial fractures. After years of mental therapy the man re-gains full cerebral capabilities and is extremely cautious to keep an eye out for potentially dangerous bars that present a threat to his fragile reconstructed skull.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A Russian who dosen't like vodka

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Two birds fly onto a bench. They cherp 3 times and sit there enjoying the nice weather.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops