YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse and progressive world in which we live.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Who keeps knocking on the wall? My neighbors have sex a lot.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Moe: What's the difference between blue paint and red paint? Ben: I couldn't tell you, I'm blind. Moe was so embarrassed by his unintentional rudeness that he apologized to Ben and walked away.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was the black man holding the knife in such a particular manner? Because he was getting dinner ready for his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

The elephant and the mouse was gonna go swimming at the lake, but they realize the Elephant forgot his swimming trunks! Mouse: Do you really need two trunks? Elephant: Oh well I can do with this one... but its not a swimming trunk! Mouse: Huh? Moral: Huh?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How do you stop a clown from laughing? You hit it in the face with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How do you make a plummer angry? Kill his family

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did Peter go to the dentist? Because he had to go to the dentist!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the black man drown? Because he grew up in a poor neighborhood, where no one had a pool, and so he never learned how to swim

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why i didn't bought the "Anti Joke The Book".. Because the joke in it aren't funny..

thumb_up thumb_down -7

So I was sitting in the doctor's when I noticed a guy sitting about two seats down, wearing a sombrero and pouring salt over himself. Then I found out I had cancer and promptly lost all interest in him.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Hey Eliz, just a final thought, if and when I die (hey I am your step dad after all, dont forget I am four years older than you now! So ill die first anyway, hopefully) Promise me that you will call me on the phone and either yell SNAKE ANSWER ME SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE! Or BOSS ANSWER ME BOOOOOOOOOOSS! Never mind, I never liked videogames ironically, but hey, its funny, Suddenly this Boss guy shows up, and I feel like I have something in common with someone! A game character anyway, and its a fucking boring game too, just sneaking around, then you got to well pay people to build shit and I shut it off by then... ...Finally the nurses are here... Those guys again, hey guys, I cant speak nor remember what button to press to delete shit, but I heard bogosexuals with an h, dont get the message, you see the man with broken fingers there, go get me female nurses or... They sleeping? And not with me? Okay guys, get me out of here, I am humiliating myself in front of my uh... Frienddaughtersisterthing as for the rest of you fucks, has it ever seemed like I have ever cared about your inferior opinions above my superhuma... I am drun or something huh guys? 60 MG valium? You fucking murderers! Well will that other dru.. Fine then... Nero The End? Seriously flaggots! I cant stop typing, just get me out of this... Wheelchair? When did that happen? Well roll me out then! And please you know, fill that code thing and the terms and all that.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why couldnt the car move? It got blown up by a tank.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did Bob Marley Shoot the Sheriff? Because he was black.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why was the boy sitting alone? Because all his friends died.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

The other day I saw this dog. It said woof.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What happened when Chuck Norris tried to divide by zero? He found that he was not very good at math, and moved on to another joke concerning himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Whats worse than finding out that your family is dead? finding a worm in your apple

thumb_up thumb_down -7

what is sticky and brown?a stick

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the guy say to the other guy? LOOK AT MY EYEBROWS!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasnt that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Redneck girls. Now there's a joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops