Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but an orange gourd. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

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What's something 9/10 people enjoy? A gang rape.

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You know what's funny? Lot's of things.

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What did the German say when the whole of India blew up: "Wow, das muss eine gewaltige Explosion haben! Wie haben sie das geschafft?"

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Why don't elephants eat bananas? Because they don't have opposable thumbs.

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How do you kill chuck norris? With a gun...from 40 feet away

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An early Jewish man walks into a bar where a number of stormtroopers have gathered for drinks and is taken into custody and then delivered by railcar to a camp where he and other persecuted minorities are deliberately imprisoned in a relatively small space with inadequate facilities where they await their mass execution.

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WHAT'S LESS THAN 0? FIONN'S DIGNITY AFTER HENRY'S

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What do you call a man man with no arms and no legs floating in the ocean? Bob(he is bobbing in the water)

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Why did the boy die? He got shot in the face repeatedly.

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Oh wow, I've never seen one that big before. Thats what the 12 year old boy said as he starred at the the Great Pyramid of Pharaoh Khufu.

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What did the peanut say to the jelly

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Three politicians walk into a sports bar. Suddenly, everyone is watching the Stanley Cup playoffs.

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WELCOME TO THE SECRET BEYOND THE SIXTH SENSE! 1, Sound 2. sight 3.touch 4.Smell 5.Taste. 6.Balance? :(

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A man with short term memory loss loses his memory every day. His last memory before his accident is the day he escaped this hostpital and murdered a family of five. He continues to do this every day and he is known in Mexico as cincochico.

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why was 6 afraid of 7?

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What's the difference between 9/11 and Jenga? The World Trade Center wasn't ruined by clumsiness.

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HEY YOU!!!!

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what did tyrone want for Christmas? A dad.

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What's the difference between my father and my mother. My father isn't an alcoholic

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What did the doctor say to the little boy? Pull down your pants and cough.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

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Whats worse than forgetting some thing at the supermarket? your nuts being nail gunned to the wall.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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