Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a truck.

what did the chicken cross the road? because its a chicken

If John has no nose, what do John's friends call him? John

A termite walks into the pub and says "Is the bar tender here?"

"Do you live in the United States?", said the man. "no." said the other man, "cool beans", said the woman.

What is better than AIDS? Cancer.Cancer and more cancer

Antijoke the book. Seriously it sucks ass, do not bother, they only included the very worst ones.

What do you call a dog with no legs? Disabled.

Q: What did Steve say to his teacher on the first day of school? A: "My name is Steve."

What did Helen Keller name her children? Nothing, since she didn't have any.

Why was Sally's dad crying? Because Sally got raped. Why was Sally crying? Her dad raped her.

Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Siete inglesi quindi non sapete nemmeno cosa c'è scritto ? Succhiacapre che non siete altro.

Why is this funny? cause it is funny

Why was the black man scared of the chainsaw? Because his father was killed by one when he landed on it when he fell of his ladder that was holding him up while he was cutting the limbs of a tree.

Boy: "Mom, I don't want to walk in circles anymore." Mother: "Shut up or I'll nail your other foot to the ground."

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had a gun

A rabbi walks into a bar, in traditional Jewish garb. The bartender takes one look at him and says "Sorry, you'll have to leave". The Jewish gentleman says "Why, don't you serve Jews in here?". The bartender replies "Of course we do, but we just found asbestos in the walls and we're closing for remodeling." The rabbi politely apologizes for making misplaced assumptions about the bartender's place of business.

69

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind.

Have you seen Stevie wonders new house..... It's ok he hasn't either.

A boy was crying. He had been abused and beaten by his parents, and thrown in his room. He was devastated, and wanted to kill himself. He tossed and turned in bed, and moaned himself to sleep. When he awoke, he felt a chill up his spine, noticing that all of his blankets had been torn off of his bed, leaving only him and his mattress. He open the window, and jumped out of his three story building. Luckily, his bedroom was on the first floor. He ran away, and found a rich family that loved him so much until a week later, a murderer came and killed everyone, including him.

Whats the difference between a 100 dead babies and a ferrari? One is an automobile and the other is a tragic reminder that SIDS is a serious and deadly problem.

knock knock. Who's there? The delivery man.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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