What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting ran over by a truck.

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Why does it matter, they can't chuck wood in the first place.

What's the difference between Chuck Norris and broccoli? A lot.

what did you call a bench full of white guys? The NBA

Batman, Superman, Spiderman and Wonder Woman walk into a bar. The bartender decides to ruin the joke by saying nothing.

how do you stop a speeding vehicle? throw a refrigerator at it.

why did the lesbians shop at modell's? because they thought the store had reasonable prices and considerable discounts

How to do you kill a blonde? Various methods, most effective of which is firing squad

Twenty-Four

knock, knock whos there the police your son was the victim of a cruel homocide

Why was Newton surprised when the apple fell on his head? Because he was sitting under a pear tree.

Do you know what my favorite rhetorical question is?

Why did the kid fail? He procrastinated.

What happens when you murder someone? The Government murders you.

What do you call a ostrich with no legs? Damn, that's funny.

What's black and white and read all over? A zebra family that was just murdered by African poachers.

A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is a little peculiar and then becomes aware he is actually dreaming. He wakes up from his dream and begins to tell his wife about the ridiculous dream he had. His wife just ignores him, the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes his marriage is in shambles.

I hate chocolate. I hate it so much. It sickens me. The only thing I hate more than chocolate is people that like chocolate. I hate them even more. Do you know what happened to the last person I met that liked chocolate? NOTHING

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? he was epileptic

How do you fit 100 jews in a car? It wouldn't work.. Nevermind.

What's worse than nailing 10 babies to a tree? Nailing1 baby to 10 trees

Is there any non dirty numbers these days, 69, just kidding

What's Chris Benoit up to? Just hangin' with his family

why did helen cellars dog runway. you would to if ur name was ujujujujjujujujujujj

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...