The president, Oprah and Abraham Lincoln are sitting in a crashing airplane. lol

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How do you get a Jewish man out of a pool? Ask him politely, for I'm sure he's a pleasant and reasonable fellow.

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Kim Kardashian got a job.

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Q: Why did the boy fall off his bike? A: Someone threw a refridgerator at his head.

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What did Chuck Norris say when he saw a cop -Hi

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if dave has 50 candy bars and eats 45 what does he have? diabeties.

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What's brown and smelly? Poop.

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What' do you call a fart in a box? Your mom's puzsy

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What is the difference between a black man and a white man? The pigment in their skin.

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Sometimes when you drink sperm you choke

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Why did the black family cry? Tyler Perry died

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why did suzy drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock! who's there? not suzy.

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What is blue and angry? Mr Johnston wearing his green dress. I'm colour blind but he came round to my way of thinking in the end.

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Good question, probably because I cannot get enough focus to "put a spell" on anyone because of my allergy, I use "autocast" for the rest. "Put a spell" I have not heard that since I was 14, that's really oldschool, and kinda geeky, back then it was code talk... Which is also geeky unless it actually serves a good purpose. AAAND... I served my mandatory time in the army as a minesweeper, we got attacked by fucking allies because of a... Yeah, I killed, people on our same team, still bad people, they offed about everybody else until I showed up, long story short, yeah I offed four of them, but that's like ten years ago.. My turn, you really got a crush on me dont you?

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Q: What's the difference between a duck? A: An orange.

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What does Helen Keller's parents do when she gets in trouble? They leave the plunger in the toilet!!!

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Two men are making sandwiches, one man is spreading peanut butter over the bread and the other man is spreading honey and Italian raspberry jam over rye bread. the man with the peanut butter sandwich looks over and says "HEY, where did you get the rye bread?" and the man with the rye bread says "well my wife made it yesterday and I would be delighted if you come over for some tea, and tried some of my wife's homemade rye bread".

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What do you call love at first sight? A broken heart.

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What do giant panda bears eat? giant bamboo

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Hey i just met u And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey i just met u

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting Cow. Interrupting Cow who? Interrupting Cow Jones.

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What's the difference between liberals and communists? Nothing.

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What's brown and sticky? Fecal matter.

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there was a guy who wanted to be bad and have bitches but he died from all the smoking and drinking and went to hell for eternal damnation

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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