roses are blood violets are veins vampires are crazy and you are insane

Waht do chinease people and gambling machines have in common? They both say chink chink chink chink chink chinck

melon

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

Your momma's so stupid, her IQ is below average.

Back when I was your age, we had to entertain ourselves with video games and TV.

What do Australians and New Zealanders have against pods anyway?

the WNBA

President Donald Trump

Why can't Tommy ride a bike? Because Tommy is a goldfish.

What is black, often hung by a rope on a tree, and something white people like to play with? A tire swing.

Your mom is so stupid she makes stupid people look not stupid.

Can you say the word "toy boat" 10 times fast? No

Why did the lightbulb go out? It was on too long

why did sally fall off the swing? because she had no arms. knock knock? who's there? not sally.

Why did the egg crossed the road? If X = chicken and C = the speed of light, then 2 to the power of the road which is 12 feet across times X/C = egg

"Doctor, Doctor I think I am a pair of curtains" The man was swiftly referred to the psychiatric ward.

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

How do you make a kid with ADHD stay still? Shoot him in the knee cap

Why is John gay? Because he enjoys the penis

If your uncle helped you off An horse, would you help your uncle jack off an horse?

When I get aroused I get a solid snake

She is so fast We call her Email Instead of Emily...

A man violently raped a small child. Unfortunately the child had aids and gave them to the man.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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