Why did Winston Churchill cross the road? Grave robbery has become a huge problem lately in the United Kingdom.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the squirrel cross the... *Squash*

thumb_up thumb_down -17

The awkward moment when you have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was an object of great appeal to him on the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why do Christians believe in God? Because they're stupid

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What was Hellen Keller's dogs name? dhfgbvskjne How did Hellen Keller's dog die? Natural causes.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Ron Paul for President!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why is Keven's name spelled with an E Because his parents are black.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's the difference between a plumber and a husband? Both fuck the same women when the other is away.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q. How many lemons does one person take to fill a ladder? A. Fish

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: What did Steve say to his teacher on the first day of school? A: "My name is Steve."

thumb_up thumb_down -19

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Not Suzy" "Why?" "Because she has no arms"

thumb_up thumb_down -19

s e m e n

thumb_up thumb_down -19

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir......my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

69

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A rabbi walks into a bar, in traditional Jewish garb. The bartender takes one look at him and says "Sorry, you'll have to leave". The Jewish gentleman says "Why, don't you serve Jews in here?". The bartender replies "Of course we do, but we just found asbestos in the walls and we're closing for remodeling." The rabbi politely apologizes for making misplaced assumptions about the bartender's place of business.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How many light bulbs does it take to screw a blonde? She said she can do 3

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q: Why isn't Michael Jordan able to jump into space with only 1 leap? A: If that were possible, the supposedly absolute laws of physics would've been irreversibly violated to the full extent that the future of science would be in trouble and the future of some already mentally-unstable people would've been deeply jeopardized to a state that they couldn't naturally recover from.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

what did Marvin Gay's father say to him before he died? "hey come listen to this 45 real quick"

thumb_up thumb_down -19

My friend billy had a ten foot.... Garden hose. Upon showing it to the neighbour next door he hit it with a rake which significantly shortened it and subsequently had to buy another

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Violets are blue, Roses are red, I like to mix up my poems.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Your mama so fat she often lays awake at night wondering if you father is happy with their sex life. He isn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

I enjoy owboy butt sex with big black men please call me at 9528579236

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops