Q. What did the dog say to the cat? A. Ruff.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead. Q: Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? A: Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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What did the guy who killed Osama Bin Laden say? Burn!

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What's red and smells like a rose? Bumble-bees licking honey off of a stick.

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e4ryka mcgyuire rode stephanie sinnott

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How do you stop a vehicle moving at high speeds? Apply the brakes in a reasonable fashion.

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What is the best way to kill Kony? Shoot him in the head.

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How do you get a Virginia graduate off of your porch? Pay him for the pizza

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Don't you sometime just want to chop of your toes and stomp around to prove to the so called 'experts' that it is possible for a person to walk without toes? . . . . . . me neither

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why did timmy die he was shot in the head by terrorists

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What happens when you cross a kangaroo and an elephant? Absolutely nothing. The two belong to entirely different animal families and their reproductive abilities are totally incompatible. A kangaroo could never fertilize an elephant, or vice versa. To suggest anything else is unrealistic and a physical impossibility.

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an abosolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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titanic vs 9/11 who would win? Well the titanic backwards is a ship which saves lives and 9/11 backwards is a building on fire spitting out airplanes

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Why is a bulldog so aggressive Because it was raised for dog fights in basements Dog fights aren't right kids, and you should never get involved but if you find yourself in the cage fighting one of the dogs, you should really think about how you got there.

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A man knocks on a wooden door. A woman says who is it?

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a boy walks over to the living room and shouts " happy birthday, daddy!!" the response is "i'm a cup, therefore i do not have a birthday because i am an inanimate object."

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What is pink, female and has two dicks? A mother with two sons, both called Richard.

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The Pope

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a terrorist.

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Black Friday

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Why was the kid happy? Because it was his birthday.

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The last time Jesse saw his **** was the day..........oh wait it's never happened

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What's worse than finding out you have cancer? Not much, that would not be so great.

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Why is Santa's sack so big? He has a malignant tumour on his testicle. We're all very worried about him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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