When life gives you lemons, thank life for its generosity.

What do you do if you see an alien landing? This depends entirely on the circumstances under which the landing takes place. It also depends on the observed nature of the alien,but given the high unlikelihood of this occurrence, one may be safe in the knowledge that he or she will never have to deal with such a mental state of stress.

What does a bartender say to almost all of his customers? May I please see your I.D.

What has two legs, but cant walk? Steven Hawking

What's red and hurts your teeth. Answer: a brick

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? "Robin get in the car"

Why are Germans good at soccer The Holocaust.

Why did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

How do you know this is an Antijoke? Its on anti-joke.com

Why aren't elephants allowed in public pools? Because they are elephants.

John Stamos.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Well babies don't have the strength or coordination to hold a paint brush, so you may need to call some painters.

who is mark

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Why, apples are the optimum environment for the worm species, offering a stable temperature with the efficiency of nutrition and comortable value, therefore in reality finding a worm in your apple is a healthy suggestion that the Global Warming effects on Earth have not yet affected the ever increasing innocent worm population.

Greg told a joke. It wasnt funny...

What's a pirate's favorite school subject? Pirate math.

Three moose were in the middle of the road. They were then shot by a maniac hunter.

Why did the little boy fall of his swing? Some one killed him.

Why did annie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms! Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Annie!

How many jews can you fit into a car? 2 in the front, 2 in the back, and a thousand in the ash tray.

Joe: Hey, why are your counters all red and your blender looks broken? Me: The same reason why Mrs. Johnson's baby is missing. ajl

Queens Park rangers

A Christian walks in into a bar . . . mitzvah.

What starts with N, ends with R, and is a black guy? NeighboR!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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