Your sister's feet smell so bad people encourage her to go home and wash them.

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Your mother is so stupid that she has trouble discerning certain facts from fiction.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the hospital? A: The victim of a violent mob attack

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Whats sad about a city bus full of black people exploding. NOTHING

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Bushes are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!

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How do you fit a homosexual man into a small card board box? You cut him into pieces.

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Why was the black man hand cuffed by a woman cop? Because they are a married couple who feel like role play will help spark their sex life again.

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Why are tootsie rolls brown? because they are....

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Why did the man buy Trojan for his women? It's condom curtsey.

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Violets are red. Roses are blue. I am drunk, and i'm about to spew.

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what did bob say to joey, nothing joey's dead

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What do you call a penis without hair? Apple sause

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What did the rapist say before the little girl got in the van? Get in the van

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What's yellow, long, hard, and moves up and down? A banana in an elevator...

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Friend: "Hey man! Did you hear about the kid who bought the last hamster at the pet shop? Other friend: "No..." Friend: "Oh, well he shot himself last night."

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Knock Knock! Who's there? I am.

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What starts with 'P' and ends with 'orn'? Popcorn.

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What's purple and gross? Purple gross stuff

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Dad: "Happy birthday, son! Let's go get a beer." Timmy: "But dad, birthdays are merely symbolic of how another year has gone by and how little we've grown. No matter how desperate we are, we hope that someday a better self will emerge, with each flicker of the candles on the cake, we know it's not to be, that for the rest of our sad, wretched pathetic lives, this is who we are to the bitter end. Inevitably, irrevocably; happy birthday? No such thing.” Timmy's mom had just died of cancer a few days ago. A friend walks in the door, not knowing Timmy's mom died just a few short days before his birthday. He screams, "Happy birthday!" TImmy: "Damn. I'm not going through this again."

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A guy trips a blind man.

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What did the lamp say to the pencil? Nothing. Lamps and pencils are inanimate objects and are also non sentient so therefore are incapable of talking or listening or having any emotions.

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Who is Jonathan Ezell He is Jonathan Ezell

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why did the chicken cross the road? Does it matter why, it just did.

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once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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