What do you call a bus filled with White, Chinese, and Black people? Public transportation.

Why didnt the chicken cross the road? -Its a chicken you dumb shit.

What did the daddy hamster say to the baby hamster? Nothing. Male hamsters eat their young.

Two penguins are sitting on an ice flow. One says to the other: "hey--you know, it looks like you are wearing a tuxedo." The other one says, "who says I'm not?"

Why did little Jimmy cry when his Rolls Royce got destroyed? Because his parents were in it.

Whats horny and big A dick minus the big part!

Why did suzy fall of the swing? -she had no arms... Why couldn't she get back up? -she had no friends

Q: Why does my arm itch? A: I got bit on the arm by a mosquito

How did the guy feel after his wife died? Pretty shitty, I'd imagine..

What do you call a fish with no eyes? A blind fish, who had a horrible accident with a fishing hook

how may i help you

How do you get a little kid out of a tree Throw a jar of foreskin at him

What did the psycho killer order for dessert? Ice Cream.

What did the doctor say to the young boy? We only planned on a annual checkup but have discovered that your and aids baby and only have 3 days to live. Tell your family members goodbye you'll be on life support in the next couple hours.

Duh, its red not ginger, like really really red... Not unlike my eyes, which is a bit of the reason I dye it., I also use colored contact lenses most of the time now.

Your Mom is so fat... I'm sorry I didn't mean that.. I have abandonment issues.

What is worse than a worm in your apple? An apple in your worm!!!

This boy. We shall call him George. George was skating down the street when he passed the market. George stopped and looked in when he saw this SWEET pair of shoes! They were priced for 20 bucks. So George rushed home and went to his dad who was mowing the lawn. "DAD DAD!" "what?" The dad said. "I FOUND THESE SWEET PAIR OF SHOES! Can you lend me 20 bucks?" His dad shook his head and George ran inside the house and went up to his mom who was washing the dishes. "Mom can you lend me 20 bucks for these sweet shoes?" His mom just looked at him funny and said, "No". Angry, George set off upstairs to his sister's room who was on the computer. "Sis can you lend me...." "GET OUT OF MY ROOM!!" She slammed the door in his face. George sighed and went to his room. But before he got to his door, he saw a 20 dollar bill on the floor. He picked it up and rushed to the store. Once he got the shoes he ran back home to his dad. "Dad DAD! Look at these.." He stopped and saw his dad that was under the lawnmower dead. George shrugged and went inside to his mom. "Mom mom! Look at these...." He stopped and saw that his mom was stuffed in the dishwasher, dead. George sighed and ran upstairs to show his sis. "Hey sis look at...." She was found with her head in the computer screen, dead. So George sighed and walked down to the living room. He plumped on the couch and wondered about how his family died. Then there was a knock on the door. George hesitated. It knocked again. He got up and went to the door. Opened it and out stood a penguin. He stared at the penguin. "What do you want?!" The penguin stared back. What did he say?????? Nothing penguins can't talk.

"Hey, why won't you let me through?" "These tickets are fake." "No they aren't. LOOK OVER THERE!" The guard turns around, and then turns back. Minorly inconvenienced, he arrests the man immediately, upon which he is sent to jail and anally raped multiple times.

guys stop with the jewish jokes anne frainkly its getting old

Q-- Why did the boy stop playing football? A -- He had to go for his tea

Why did the teenager cross the road? To get an abortion.

What did the big chimney say to the smaller chimney? Nothing chimneys don't talk

Why did the man go to jail? He abused and later murdered his spouse.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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