yolo mother f-uckaaaa

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some dreams stay dreams, But some dreams come true. Some want to be god, They want to have made us. But I want to be an astronaught, So I can explore Uranus.

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Me: Sometimes I like to talk to myself. Me: So do I.

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What's long, black, and sticky? Licorice.

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Why is a charlie horse called a charlie horse? Well there was this boy charlie and he had a horse and it died in a fire.

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Why was 97 afraid of 98? Because 98,99, 100!

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what's worse than getting a paper cut? Hiroshima

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whats long and green? weed

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What has four wheels and smells like an asshole? YOU.

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What do you call a loser on a game? A Dirty Hacker

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Q: whats better than having sex? A: nothing

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What did the vegitarian order for dinner? Vegatables

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How many walls can you paint with a baby? Depends on how hard you throw it.

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What is the answer to number 7 on the test? Time for you to get a watch.

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What was the tallest mountain before Mount Everest was discovered? Mount Everest

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Why did Max drink the red Gatorade? Because he likes it more than all of the other flavors.

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Why didn't Jeffrey become a butler? He did become a butler.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven looked angry and had a gun.

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Who is the worst teacher ever? Mrs. Thompson

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Whats better than 24? 25.

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What do you call a puppy that has been left in the cold? A puppsicle

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was Friday night (or Halloween or St. Patty's Day) and the chicken was at a party. He got totally drunk, and then got the bright idea that it would be okay to drive home. On a rural two-lane highway, his vehicle careened into the oncoming traffic lane, and then the ditch, thus crossing the road. Fortunately, he walked away with only a few scratches. However, he was cited for wreckless driving, and got a DUI as well.

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Are you from Africa? Because you're black.

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how big is the moon? why the hell are you asking me?...dumbass.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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