What did the martian say to the other martian when he saw a fire hydrant? "Hey look, I found a fire hydrant!"

Pinus Testicles

'l give you a nickle to tickle my pickle i'l give you a dime to take you time

im jacob, i have as much hair on my penis as mr macs head.....none.

What's worse than some one spitting in your food Hitler revealing he's actually a Jew

Your so ugly that your birth certeficate is a apology letter from the condum factory

What happened when a man drove up to an escort and said "want to check my bags?" The escort replied "Certainly, sir" due to the fact the escort worked at a hotel.

Why do you always find a dead baby in the last place you look? Because once you've found it, you stop looking.

Knock Knock Whos there? It's me your mom you dumbass and let me in

Q. what do you call a black guy? A. N IGGER

whats worse than a baby in a bathtub? its dead. Whats worse than that? its in a clown suit. Whats worse than that? The baby had down syndrome.

Why do Chinese people have flat faces? Air bags.

A woodchuck could chuck wood but a woodchuck couldn't chuck Norris because Norris isn't a type of wood.

Why did the ship crash into Italy? Because a woman took over driving it!

Knock Knock Go Away

Moral below, I understand you are one of us, but you are not supposed to act when I, your leader is spreading the message, if you want to risk harming the fundation behind your status as a shadow and its benefits, I suggest you cease signing your comments with moral. Moral the friendly neighbourhood r*pist: "Ruining the fundation behind the life of your choosing, will always end up ruining your chance to live and act freely, if you are a true shadow, then you will follow and obey"

How do you stop a second date from happenin? You force a dead mouse in your date's vagina.

Q: Why don't people like me? A: Because I smell bad and I give off a creepy vibe

you know what they say about men with big feet... damn you got some big feet.

Wanna hear a great joke? (any answer) Your dad's choice of condom.

Q: What's long and brown? A: The unemployment line.

Theres a monkey that walks into a bar. I forget the rest of the joke but your moms a w****

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and trampoline? Well, children jump on one to obtain enjoyment, while a pile of dead babies is a sick tragedy.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she was deaf and blind and would have been a hazard to herself and others.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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