Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Seeing your mom dance

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why did the plane crash the pilot was Suicidal

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yo momma is so stupid she went and got her self checked for mental retardedness and it turns out she happens to be autistic.

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A Mormon bishop, a Jewish Rabbi, and a Moslem Imam all died on the same day. They went to hell because they thought their good works would save them.

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What happened when the kid tried to hang himself? He was overweight, so the ceiling fan that the rope was tied to fell out of the ceiling. When he explained this to his drunk mother when she got home, she reinforced the fact that he was overweight (his low self esteem was the root of his depression) and beat him. The next day, he just chugged antifreeze. This isn't a true story. Just calm down.

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So a mouse walks into a bar....the bartender immediatly kills it because he doesn't want another C rating by the sanitation department.

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When a blonde entered a bar, she ordered a something that was a double-entendre. The bartender understood what she was trying to say, gave her her order whatever alcohol she happened to consume, and the blonde woman could not have been more courteous.

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Q) How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A) It shouldn't take more than one person to do this task, regardless of hair color.

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A man walks into the bar with his parrot, but sadly the parrot was attacked ferociously by a flock of seagulls and it died.

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Hitler, Goebbels and Göring walked into a bar. They ordered 3 steins and took their seats in quiet corner of the establishment. After short deliberation they were ready to start work on building a highway that would be the envy of the world.

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What do you call 55,000 clowns exiting a small car? Fiction.

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GINGER PEOPLE

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DONT READ THIS. YOU WILL BE KISSED ON THE NEAREST POSSIBLE FRIDAY BYrnTHE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE.TOMMOROW WILL BE THE BEST DAY OF YOUR LIFE. NOWrnYOU'VE STARTED READING THIS. DON'T STOP. THIS IS SO FREAKY.rn1. say your name ten times.rn2.say your mom's name five times.rn3. say your crushes three timesrn4. paste this to four other groups.rnIf you do this, your crush will kiss you on the nearest Friday.rnBut if you read this and do not paste this, then yournwill have very bad luck.rnSEND THIS TO 5 GROUPS IN 143 MINUTES. WHENrnYOU'RE DONE PRESS F6 AND YOUR CRUSH'S NAME WILL APPEAR IN BIG LETTERSrnON THE SCREEN. THIS IS SO FREAKY BECAUSE IT ACTUALLY WORKSrnrnrn

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got mercifully trampled by a nearby 18 wheeler.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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Yo mama's so fat, that she's fat.

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What did Chuck Norris say to the man that asked for his autograph? He happily obliged and continued on with his day.

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and the final bell wrung then they started the mtch and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing that you say when you don't want to fight and ypu let the other person win?" The other guy says, "I give up?" Then the challenger says, " I WIN!!!"

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Q. How do you get a dinosaur off a slide? A. You tell him he hasn't lived for billions of years.

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How do you describe a funny man on stilts? Stand up comedy

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Why was the black boy late for school? He missed the bus

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What did the pc say to the Mac? You suck

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Why do men find it difficult to look each other in the eyes? The answer actually has deep routes in their psyche, subconsious, and psychological development as children.

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whats up fuch you bitch

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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