a black guy with a parrot on his shoulder was walking down the street. another man asked, "where did you get him?" The parrot said, "theres tons of them in africa."

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Hitler: Ve shud vork togeza and place stategic bombs overr your island. Castro: You are dead.

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if I was a girl I would be touching my self everywhere if I was a girl as a boy I would make a diffrence in poltics but thats not gonna happen.

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Why did Max drink the red Gatorade? Because he likes it more than all of the other flavors.

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You know what isn't funny? Getting punched in the face. You know what is funny? Brittany Spears getting punched in the face.

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What did the blind boy get for Christmas? The same toys from last year.

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How do you give Salley enough energy swim against the river current? Add your own electric current.

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Why does Polly want a cracker? Because meth is too intense.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was DEAD!

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all walk into a bar. Because, often, friends go out together in social situations.

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What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, oceans and beaches are both not alive, thus incapable of speech and feeling emotions

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face!

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Roses are 3:18 Violets are 3:18 I Just figured out a pattern. And saved peoples lives with the help of Keifer Sutherland.

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Why did the homeless man cross the road? The soup kitchen has just reopened after months of rebuilding from a fire. He was very hungry.

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A fat man and his dog walk into a bar...the man buys a beer and walks out

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Why did Silly Billy throw a clock out the window? Because he was stupid.

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whats orange, nocturnal, and hurts to the touch? The sun or an orange owl... Depends on your preference

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Where did the cow go? To the slaughter house!!!

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what has 50 legs, but can't walk? half of a centipede

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Roses are red. Violets are red. My thumb is red because I accidentally put it in the toaster.

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Q. what did the gay man say about the smoothie? A. he said "that is soooo good"

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If no means yes and yes means no, what is yes? Yes

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How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

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This is you cat This is just cat This is wasted cat This is your cat This is time cat This is reading cat This is this cat Now read the third word of every sentance

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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