A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

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Why do fancy unicorns wear jackets? Because they're fancy.

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whats red with blue spots and is highly inteligent? an apple. i lied to you and am sorry

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What did Frieza say to Vegeta after killing his parents? "I killed your parents."

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Shit I'm bleeding.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a homicidal maniac, six has every right to be afraid

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Whats the difference between an apple and an orange? A banana because a motorcycle has no windows.

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While I was walking home from school one day, James Brown jumped out of a bush and punched me in the face. Then, when I got home, there was a walrus sitting on my couch. He then turned to look at me and said, "Penis". I then immediately farted out blades of grass.

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one day 2 strawberrys walked to the ice cream store and ordered a small cup of banana ice cream they were realley happy they were later taken in and tortured and raped

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why did the man fall off his bike? He got shot by the navy seals, He was a highly decorated terrorist.

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A man walks into a bakery and buys a doughnut. He then starts to drive home when he realised that he'd forgoten to eat the doughtnut and has to returne to do so.

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no, ten dead babies nailed to ten dead babies.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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What did the boy with no eyes get for Christmas? Glasses

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What is the quickest way to a mans heart? Through his chest with a stick.

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Waht do chinease people and gambling machines have in common? They both say chink chink chink chink chink chinck

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What did the lady find out when she went to the doctor. She had breast cancer.

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Why did the lightbulb go out? It was on too long

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why did sally fall off the swing? because she had no arms. knock knock? who's there? not sally.

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HEY YOU!!!!

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What do you get when you cross a canary and a lawnmower? Nothing. A canary is a small bird, and a lawnmower is an inanimate object. Any procreation of this sort would likely produce no offspring.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is a woman.

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>posts joke >mistaken for anti-joke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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