An Asian man, a black man, and a gay man walk into a bar. They all buy the same drink, are charged the same price and say " We are all equal! " They then continue on with their days normaly.

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Happy Birthday! Your mom is dead!

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What's the difference between a teacher and a train? A lot.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

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While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, a bus hit it half way along and it died instantly.

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What's the difference between a truckload of dead babies and a truckload of bowling balls? You can't unload the bowling balls with a pitchfork.

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there is a black guy riding a bicycle. he is extremely skilled on it and says he has never fallen off.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? An Alzheimers's patient. An Alzheimers's patient who? To get to the other side!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? ....Because based on modern mathematics the shortest distance between two points is a straight line.

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Jesus said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But, John came fifth and won a toaster.

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What did your mom say after she went sky diving? Nothing, her parachute didn't open

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What's the difference between a duck and a belt? One floats in water and I don't remember the rest but you are a whore.

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what did binladin say when he got to hell? oh no. im in hell

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Knock, knock. Knock, knock. Knock, knock. Guess no ones home.

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What's a fail with a bowl on its head, a 30 year old, and a 5 year old at the same time? Justin Beiber

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"Knock Knock" "Whose there?" "It's who's." The grammar nazi has struck again.

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Q:how man ADD kids does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: I dont know, wanna go ride bikes?

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how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop!? thats what she said

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What rhymes with bigger and can jump really high? Tigger

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sticks and stones may break my bones but hemophilia will make me bleed to death

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Why shouldn't you ask Lebron James for change for a dollar? Because in the year 2013 Lebron will tear his ACL and will never able to play the game again. He then won't be able to land a job because he never finished college. After being unable to land a job, he then develops an expensive crack addiction. His house gets foreclosed, and he becomes broke. And is then a homeless broke man who does not even have 4 quarters to his name.

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What did the table say to the human? Nothing, tables don't talk.

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what do you call a man with no friends? it's because of all the wear and tear that's done to the socks being thrown in her, and she desanitizes only the nun with no forebeard

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops