What do Abraham Lincoln and George Washington have in common? They both had beards, except for Washington.

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What do you do when you walk downstairs and see your TV floating? Call Ghostbusters.

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Q: why was the girl so dumb A: her teacher was a blond

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Thomas the Tank Engine could see Express up ahead on the tracks! His driver shut off steam and applied his brakes. Ahead of him Gordon groaned "Ohhhhh stop your train! Stop your train! His driver and fireman jumped out quickly. Thomas tried his very hardest and eventually found himself slowing down. But there wasn't enough time and Thomas smashed right into the express. Seven people were killed and Thomas himself was smashed to pieces.

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What do you call a nun in a wheelchair? Virgin mobile XD

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if bob has 400 pieces of chocolate and eats 200 chocolates how many does he have left. none he died from diabetes

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what's bad about pushing your friend off a cliff? you can't do it twice

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Why did the man say ow? He got his dick caught in his zipper.

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How do you kill a blue elephant? Shoot it with a blue shotgun How do you kill a pink elephant? Hold it's nose and shoot it with a blue shotgun.

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What do you call a stupid anti-joke? Stupid.

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whats are the similarities between a dolphin and a bus? they both have wheels, aside from the dolphin. it does not,

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Knock knock Who's there? Death. Come with me.

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Seriously tho, too much sex? I need to know dog.

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FREE SEX! Now that I have your attention.............

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What's the only thing a Black Hole can't absorb? Nothing. It absorbs everything, even light.

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What is white and tastes like cotton candy? Jizz

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Scholars maintain that the translations to the chickens journal were lost in a hurricane hundreds of years ago. Therefore, the chicken crossed the road for unknown reasons and died knowing it had a dull, pointless life.

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One time Chuck Norris cried. He felt slightly better after the experience, but, unfortunately, his grandmother still died of cancer.

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I used to make jokes about taking arrows to the knee then i beat the game

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What is the biggest lie in the entire universe? I agree to the terms of service.

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What did the blonde do at the WTC on 9/11? Die.

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luke moore cant pull it back

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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