What did the man say to his doctor? AHHH AHHHHH OH MY GOD! AHHH OUCH HOLY SHIT FUUUUUUCK!!!... ____/\_____/\_____/\___________________

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i homeless man asked for ome change. he didnt get any because people were afraid he would spend it on drugs

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Bill:Ask me to do something. Bob:Go get me a beer Bill:Would you like fries with that?

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a blond walks in to a post... OUCH

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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Teacher: "What is the outside layer on a tree?" Dog: "Bark" Teacher: "How would you describe the desert surface?" Dog: "Rough" Teacher: "Would you say that Abraham Lincoln was an intelligent man?" Dog: "Yarp"

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How do you make a frog stand still? Shoot it.

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw a blonde? 3.

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what do you call a Muslim flying a plane A pilot

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Why couldn't the blonde bride make it to her own wedding? She had another unplanned circumstance occur and the wedding was postponed until next week.

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What do you call a joke without a punchline?

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#Hanging Degus

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What do you call it when a cigarette is brown instead of white? A niggarette

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Why did the Jew wear a beanie while playing soccer? Because he shaved his head

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Why did the black man rob the store? Because he was hard on money for a reason not associated with race or stereotypes whatsoever.

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Best joke: Okay so I got a joke for ya but it is pretty long so bare with me please. First off, you must have heard a knock knock joke before and you must have a huge sense of humor. So this guy walks into a bar and orders fried chicken wings with hot fudge and vinilla drizzled all over it with a cherry topping. The bartender says, "We don't have that." The guy thinks of anything else he'd like and says, "How about a bucket of turkey and jalapeños?" The bartender looks puzzled and once again says, "This is a bar..." The guy is now paranoid and says, "Fine, I'll just have a thick, juicy, chicken thigh but please remove any excess skin on it, it's unhealthy and I'm on a diet." The bartender slowly removes his apron and walks out of the bar shouting, "I QUIT!" The guy sits there on the barstool laughing as a lady bartender comes to him. "So sorry sir, what would you like? From our bar that we have available?" The guy stares at her, squinting. "By any chance do you know if you have the punch line to this 'joke' because I sure dont." Slowly the woman removes her apron and walks out of the bar. The guy grins, walks out, and says, "job well done today. Where to tomorrow?"

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What did the black person say to the tall man with nice shoes? Nice shoes.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing. She's already been told twice.

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Let's not pick mushrooms in heaven.

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65% of people are starving 32% are over 190 lbs. Think about it

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Why was a small girl found dead in the town park? Because Sallie was a bitch and deserved to die.

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Why was the man called Big Larry? His name was Larry and he was morbidly obese.

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why did the cow eat the seahorse/ because my shift keys are broken1

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heads up!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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