why was the kid sad? his fish died. he had to flush it down the toilet.

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Q: Why didn't the boy go to school? A: It was the weekend.

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

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What is worse than Justin Bieber? Well, 1. Deforestation 2. Hurricanes 3. Diabetes 4. Mass Murder ....and probably much more.

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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Why do blacks run away from whites? Because god told all people to never go to the light.

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? Abbott! Abbott who? Abbott time you answered the door! The door was never answered because they did not know the person at the door.

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In Soviet Russia it is normally colder than america and most people speak russian.

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What is red and doesnt exist? No-tomato.

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The Holocaust.

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What do you call a feline attempting surgery? A catastrophe, because they aren't very good surgeons.

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What did the pornstar do after the film shoot? Called her parents and said she had a good day at work as a receptionist at a law firm. She is too ashamed to admit her real profession to them. She then cried profusely.

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What's big and hairy my penis just kidding It's Bigfoot

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I saw a coin one day but never picked it up. It was still there the next day and then the day after that when it was still there I saw a girl being sick on it...

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What did the banker say to the other banker? We're both bankers!

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yo mamma's so fat, she decided to go on a diet

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The Pope, Queen Elizabeth and a schoolboy are on a plane that is going to crash. It crashes and they all die instantly.

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there are some things i dont get. Quantum Physics is one of them.

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why dont we just take bikini bottom and push it somewhere else

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Why did the police officer arrest the black guy? Because the guy was black and the police officer was racist.

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roses are red, bitches are blue close your damn legs and use a condom too.

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Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: *smiles* Did what hurt? Boy: When you broke through the Earth's crust ascending from hell.

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A cow walks into the butcher shop, he looks around then mourns the loss of his brothers

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why did the pinapple walk the plank? to eat a cat because cheese say people!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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