I have had depression for several years and have recently been diagnosed with diabetes. I therefore drink diet soda and have sugar free snacks. Which leads to diahrea. Lots of diahrea.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

My name is Jacob Mckeand and my penis is as long as Mr. Macs hair.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What does Tourettes Syndrome have in common with short term memory loss? I DON'T FREAKING REMEMBER.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

one day i went to bed

thumb_up thumb_down +6

THAT MAN EATS TOO MUCH. therefore he is overweight.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: What do you call a Deer with no eyes? A: No ideer. Q; What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? A: Still no ideer.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a black man who walks into a jail cell? A hard working and dedicated police officer who was just putting his first offender in jail.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What is invisible, weighs 332 pounds, runs 67.3 mph, is green, and is made by Jews in China. Nothing, if something is invisible, then it cannot reflect green light, therefore it cannot be green.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A bear walked into a bar, unfortunately there were no survivors.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Do you work at subway? Because I often enjoy eating there and i think the food is pretty good. I do not however eat there everyday because i might get overweight and get a eating disorder.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

So there are two skunks in a bath tub. One of the skunks says to the other, "Would you please pass the soap?", and the other skunk says, "What do you think I am, a talking radio?!"

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Knock knock Whos there? No one, your wife was just in a fatal car accident and died on the scene, so your kids had to walk home from school instead of being picked up. Your son was captured by a sexual predator, and your daughter tried to run from them, and now she's under the wheels of the bus going round and round.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the Catholic Priest say to Chris Hanson? Nothing. He attempted to flea, and was quickly taken down by law enforcement. He was then detained and processed and charged with Intent to commit statutory rape with a minor under the age of 14. He's still awaiting trial.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

So yesterday I went to find a pair of camo pants, And I did

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What is a homeless man for Halloween? A garbage bag

thumb_up thumb_down +4

I walked into an elevator with Ray Rice...

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How old is george washington? anyway thats not the point your pregnant

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why was Jimmy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his forehead.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do you stop a Polish army on horseback? With artillery.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

The game!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Dylan Hodge fingered himself. Hah.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Wanna here a joke? Canadians.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops