how do you beat up 3 year old with ease? you beat her up, 3 years can't fight for shit.

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What was jesus's first miracle? He made a blind man walk. And for the stupid people out there jesus's first supposed miracle was making a cripple Walk

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Why did Billy drop his ice cream? He found out his family was killed in a terrorist attack.

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roses are red, violets are red, a girl had her period in my garden.

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What's funny about the old man who got stabbed? Nothing... you're a sick person!

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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Why does the gay person where a leather motorcycle suit? Because he drives motorcycles.

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69

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Why did the little kid fall off the rollercoaster? His dad threw him off.

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Remember when they called online casino`s betting sport? Anti Joke potential detected. I used to play soccer and box back then, but I guess I was still not "sporty" enough for betting sports... And as thus I afforded my lawyer education. Moral: Now that you know my education, do you really think id ever type real morals here? Mwahahahaha!

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whats better than holocaust...911 cardiac?

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Whats worse then getting caught in the rain with no umbrella? Aids.

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the doctor says to the patient " i have some good news and some bad news" the patient says well what is it dock " well the good news is your fine " the patient asked what the bad news was and the doctor said " i lied about you being fine you have aids, and testicular cancer and you have 2 days to live"

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. One rainy night an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them out for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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What do you call a dumb blonde with no hair? You don't, since there is no way of knowing that she is blonde.

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How do you you know when you haven't slept in a while? You're tired.

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Why did the blind kid hit the other kid in the face? He was trying to give him a high-five.

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What did Helen Keller name her children? Nothing, since she didn't have any.

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What did Frankenstein say to Dracula? Hey, that's a nice cape.

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? The Farmer immediately noticed the oncoming car and flagged it down so the driver would stop and he could grab his chicken and carry it safely back to the coop

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yo mama is so fat even dora cant explore her

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whats the difference between a flamingo ? because the pyramid has a high cholesterol

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What did the diabetic boy with Celiac get for christmas? A gift from his loving parents.

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What is Soulja Boy's favorite letter? I don't know. You go ask him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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