why did the girl cross the road? to commit suicide

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tims sty:)

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What did the toaster say to the raisin? Nothing. The toaster was mute and the raisin had lost his hearing in a terrible full-contact origami accident.

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obama

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Joker2? Who comes up with the names anyways? Sounds like a stupid version of the matrix... Anyways, I stutter because my nerves are killing me, I cant quit the painkillers cold turkey if I cant sleep without them, besides I am used to physical pain as tragic as that might sound... Its not when you get used to it. I need to know who this Neo-Nero was, for anyone that can tell me, he is not around here at these hours, and during the time he/she I was dead, did considerable damage to my and my orders reputation, I need a face to face talk to someone that would put aside my chosen successor and assume my role, and I wont let that happen again even if it means bruising up this Neo-me a bit.

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A dermatologist walks into a strip club. He tells the stripper she has hives on her back and that she needs to go to a clinic, then gets up from his lap dance and reports her to management.

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? To get to the other side!

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Cancer

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John: Hey Pablo why are you standing outside Home Depot. Pablo: Because I work here.

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What did Coke say to Pepsi? "Hello."

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if you like, i will tell my crush maddy i love her, just kidding i wont do shit.

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if life give you lemons. put them in the fridge they should be there...

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Why did the handicap man scream for help? Because he fell out of his wheel chair

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What's black and hangs from tree's? A suicidal black man.

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Boy: "Mom, I don't want to walk in circles anymore." Mother: "Shut up or I'll nail your other foot to the ground."

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There's a black guy and a white guy standing in a bar, surprisingly the black guy doesn't die. This isn't a racist joke.

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Why does Santa wear sleigh bells? Because he's got leprosy.

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whats worse than school...wait a minute?

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Whats the worst way to find out your married. Hungover

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Why do women why perfume and make up? Because they're ugly and they smell bad.

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What did the blind, deaf orphan get for Easter? Hepatitis.

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Why do women wear perfume and makeup? They smell bad and they're ugly.

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What happened to the teacher? He taught his students.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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