Q: What do you call a black hitchhiker? A: A hitchhiker

Why did the man die? He got shot!

Why was O.J acquitted for murder? A jury of his peers deliberated for many days and found there was not sufficient evidence for his conviction.

What did the hobo say while giving birth? bob come over here and hold my third leg for me??

How did the guy feel after his wife died? Pretty shitty, I'd imagine..

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Just kidding! Stephen Hawking doesn't drink.

Whats worse than an offended chicken walking around with a squirrel stapled to its back? A crusty old man with hepatitis peeing on 10 babies.

What happened to the dog who lost its legs? It Died.

Wanna hear a funny joke? I can't think of one at the moment...

Knock knock. Who's there? Knock. Knock who? Knock knock.

People could crack eggs but Chuck Norris could crack chickens.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house... Knock knock Who's there? The Chincken

Why did the kitchen cross the road?

Why was little Sammy crying? because she had a frog stapled to her forehead

Your momma's so stupid that she was declared mentally retarded by her doctors.

what makes the world go round? An axis (just jokin, its COFFEE)

Hitler: Ve shud vork togeza and place stategic bombs overr your island. Castro: You are dead.

"Hey, why won't you let me through?" "These tickets are fake." "No they aren't. LOOK OVER THERE!" The guard turns around, and then turns back. Minorly inconvenienced, he arrests the man immediately, upon which he is sent to jail and anally raped multiple times.

Uh, summa lumma dooma lumma you assuming I'm a human What I gotta do to get it through to you I'm superhuman Innovative and I'm made of rubber, so that anything you say is Ricochet in off a me and it'll glue to you And I'm devastating more than ever demonstrating How to give a motherfuckin' audience a feeling like it's levitating Never fading, and I know that haters are forever waiting For the day that they can say I fell off, they'll be celebrating 'Cause I know the way to get 'em motivated

What you reading? reading?

What's worse than kicking your dog? Eating it.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Not having enough money to buy an apple.

What did the psychiatrist say to the man when he walked into his office naked and wrapped in saran wrap? The doctor prescribes him tablets to treat his bi-polar tendencies.

What did the pedofile say to the little girl? Nothing. She was properly supervised by her parents.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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