What do men and women have in common? They're both respected members of society, besides women.

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why did sally fall off the swing? because she was a fish.

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What has two legs but can't walk? A quadriplegic man who lost mobility in his legs due to a horrific logging accident.

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What's worse than aids? Super aids.

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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Roses are red, violetes are blue, Your monkey sucks.

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Once upon a time, I was a Muslim.

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Mary had a little lamb, little lamb, little lamb Mary had a little lamb and the doctor was surprised

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how much is a microwave full of dead babies? a fridge full of dead puppies.

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What did the person with down syndrome do? He mumbled for a while, chewed on his thumb, fell flat on his face, and died.

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What's the deal with airplane food? I've never tried it. I'm just curious how it was.

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What's the difference between Chuck Norris and broccoli? A lot.

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What's one thing good about cancer? (make them guess) Nothing you fricking prick!

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Your mother was a hamster, And your father smelt of ElderBerries!

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Why was the boy embarrassed when he opened his parents' bedroom door? Because he had been trying the door for several minutes until he realized he was pushing instead of pulling.

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Why is Kony hated by the kid with ADHD? Hey look a kid being raped while watching his family getting killed.

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This is a swimmer Joke. Chuck Norris once lapped a kid in the 50 free... LONG COURSE.

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whats funnier than hugos penis? Nothing!!!!

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why did the chicken cross the road? well he usually takes the bus to his job but he missed it so he had to walk. Unrelated to this, he works at KFC

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What's worse than waking up next to an ugly girl? Waking up, sealed in a coffin which is floating on a raft traversing through shark-infested waters. Oh, and the raft is on fire.

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I am on a escalator.

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What's yellow and highly dangerous? Shark-infested banana pudding.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Someone threw birdseed.

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A: Wanna hear a joke? Womens rights B: Wanna hear another joke? Your sexist beliefs are why your single...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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