Why didn't Jimmy go to school? Because Jimmy is a brick wall.

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What did the pedofile say to the little girl? Nothing. She was properly supervised by her parents.

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Wanna hear a funny joke? I can't think of one at the moment...

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What happened to the dog who lost its legs? It Died.

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Whats the thing you least expect to find on Anti-Joke? A joke with a punchline.

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Why did the kitchen cross the road?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house... Knock knock Who's there? The Chincken

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Knock knock. Who's there? Knock. Knock who? Knock knock.

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"The hills are alive..." Impossible, hills can never be alive.

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What did the psychiatrist say to the man when he walked into his office naked and wrapped in saran wrap? The doctor prescribes him tablets to treat his bi-polar tendencies.

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Why was little Sammy crying? because she had a frog stapled to her forehead

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People could crack eggs but Chuck Norris could crack chickens.

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Hitler: Ve shud vork togeza and place stategic bombs overr your island. Castro: You are dead.

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What's worse than kicking your dog? Eating it.

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Your momma's so stupid that she was declared mentally retarded by her doctors.

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what makes the world go round? An axis (just jokin, its COFFEE)

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What do you call a tree with no branches? A stick.

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What you reading? reading?

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Not having enough money to buy an apple.

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Uh, summa lumma dooma lumma you assuming I'm a human What I gotta do to get it through to you I'm superhuman Innovative and I'm made of rubber, so that anything you say is Ricochet in off a me and it'll glue to you And I'm devastating more than ever demonstrating How to give a motherfuckin' audience a feeling like it's levitating Never fading, and I know that haters are forever waiting For the day that they can say I fell off, they'll be celebrating 'Cause I know the way to get 'em motivated

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Roes are red Violets are blue I felt silly for writing this Because violets are violet.

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What did Roadrunner name his car? Turbo Tax.

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What do you call a black thing hanging from a tree A tire swing

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Did you know that I can't talk any louder than this... Exept when I can

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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