Whats the difference between a Corvette and a dead bag of babies. -there's not a Corvette in my garage

I think people who go to see a psychiatrist need their head examining.

What's the difference between a Lamborghini and 10 dead babies? I don't keep a Lamborghini I'm my garage

How many chicken feathers are there in a 50 pound bag? 50 pounds worth Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a duck Why did the man cross the road? It was duck season A woman is dying but can't reach her husband. Why? A duck ate his cell-phone A pig walks into a bar but there is no bartender. Where is she? Dead A duck hunter is selling a duck to a man. The man only pays the duck hunter a quarter. Why? It was full of chicken feathers.

What did the president say after his wife and kids left Him? Im Obama self now

Q: How did the black man die? A: He got hit by a car, and we all know that this is painful.

There is a new film coming out, it is a re-make of "Fatal Attraction" The only difference is, it is about two tonnes of antimatter... [L]

Roses are red, violets are blue, i suck at poetry, show me your tits!

What's the difference between a dead baby and an apple? I don't cum on an apple before I eat it.

Roses are red Violets are blue The sky is blue too

What is the definition of a "crying shame"? Very similar to the definition of a shame, but moreso.

What does a carrot and a potato have in common? They're both not chocolate

What happens to the man with cancer He dies Because the pharmaceutical company wanted to profit off a synthetic drug equal to marijuana

Why did the plan crash? Because the pilot was a potato

Why was the little boy upset? An arson set fire to his house, leaving him nowhere to live.

The nurse at a hospital came out of the delivery room and chucked the baby down the hall to the father. The dad starts crying and the nurse starts laughing and said, "It's ok, it was already dead."

A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

What kinds of children go to heaven dead ones

Why did the man get a haircut? Because he had long hair.

Two cannibals are eating a clown, one says to the other: "Maybe we should rethink our ways of life and realize why animals are on this planet"

School

whats worse than finding the holocaust on your forehead? a mono brow

whats funnier than a joke? A: a funnier joke

Pi = Pie, something everybody likes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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