What did the 5 cent store clerk say to the customer? That will be 5 cents.

your momma is so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes

How do you kill a blonde? Shoot her in the head.

What happened to the clown that touched the kid? The clown got honked up

Wy did the chicken?

What do you call a snail driving a boat? An accident waiting to happen.

Q: What weighs 6 ounces, is extremely dangerous, and lives in a tree? A: A sparrow with a machine gun.

you ever hear the joke about the rabbi, the pope and an elephant? No? well its a good one...

What is the difference between a bucket of shit and a Jew? The Bucket.

O.J. Simpson. What would you do in that situation?

Why did the boy cry? Because his mother died of a heart attack.

What did the little boy get for Christmas? A pair of broken sunglasses, because his parents didn't care about him, and because he lived in Hawaii where it is very hot in December. Plus the kid's blind. By Nikhil Sridhar of Taikoo Shing, Hong Kong.

once upon a time there was a boy

What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

why did the lady fall on the ground? The cord for the parachute was cut by her husband

Q: Why is my friend gay? A: Because i slept with him.

Why did the women call 911 on her 12 year old son? Because he was schizophrenic and attempting to commit suicide by hanging himself.

antonio is ssooo shexy and smokes

try slamming a revolving door

You're so ugly you got rejected from the zoo.

Why did Sally get hit with a fridge? Because someone threw a fridge at Sally Why would someone throw a fridge at her? Because Sally has no arms

Republicans

who can beat up superman doomsday, duh, he killed him

Why did sally fall off the swing? she had no arms of legs. Knock Knock Whos there? Not sally.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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