Little girl and a pedofile walk into the woods at night. Little girl says, "mr pedofile im scared" pedofile responds " you think your scared? i have to walk out of here alone."

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Hi.

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What do you call 100 black people at the bottom of the ocean? An unfortunate tragedy and astonishingly ironic curcumstance.

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Hitler.. Hitlar... Hillar... Hillary Clinton

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Why can't the man have babies? His nuts was cut off and he eventually bleed to death.

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A horse walks into a bar... The bartender is amazed at the fact that an animal that possesses neither the mental nor the physical abilities to open doors, still managed to enter the bar without breaking anything.

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How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

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Religion.

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I was walking through the woods the other day when I heard a rustle in the bushes... So I went over and said, "Russell, What are you doing in the bushes?"

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Whats the difference between ice cream and dead babies? I'm not eating ice cream right now.

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How are people and jelly beans similar? No one likes the black ones

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why are black people so good at basketball? because they understand the fundamentals, work hard at becoming better, and have fun playing the game/

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Shoulda had a V8 ...or not because I am severely allergic to tomato's.

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look in the sky! its a bird, its a plane........ Its Miles

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Q: Wgat did Batman say to Robin before Robin got in the car? A: "Robin, get in the car"

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Why did the man cross the road? To attend his wife's funeral.

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Why didn't the boy buy his mom a gift for Christmas? He was killed by a drunk driver two years ago

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Why do seagulls fly over seas? Because if they flew over bays they'd be called bagels.

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Knock Knock Who's there? I don't know Then why should I care I don't know

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Why is Steven so gay? Because hes actually Richard Simmons

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Why did the little kid color outside the lines? He had Parkinson's Disease.

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How can you confirm that Saturday comes after friday, and that Sunday comes after Saturday? consult Rebecca Black.

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Do you know what is dead on the carpet ? Your mother

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Do you know what a third world bathroom smells like? Crap

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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