I was visiting my grandad the other day and my phone died, I was really bored, he told me I rely too much on technology I replied with 'no you do' and Unplugged his life support

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What happens when a rabbit is late for a very important date? Nothing, rabbits have no logical way to keep track of time.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock-knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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What do u call a man with no arms and no legs and is laying in front of a door? Matt

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Have you ever heard the story of Mikey Braford? Every morning when he was little, his father would fill a gym sock with nickels and beat him with it. Mikey has severe attachment disorder and frequent suicidal thoughts.

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what makes the world go round? An axis (just jokin, its COFFEE)

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How do you get money out of a Jew? You convince him your cause is worthwhile.

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What did the hungry man do? He ate.

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Why did the chicken sneeze? Because someone put pepper on its nose.

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Theres a man with 2 eyes.

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Pinus Testicles

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What's the difference between a jew, a muslim and a christian. They follow different belief systems

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Knock knock Who's there Your son and his vagina.

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Why couldn't the cat drink his milk? Because he didn't have a face

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Why was Rosa Parks forced to sit in the back of the bus? Every seat wsa taken, and the back was her only option

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Why did little Jimmy cry when his Rolls Royce got destroyed? Because his parents were in it.

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Get in the car.

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What is worse than Justin Bieber? Well, 1. Deforestation 2. Hurricanes 3. Diabetes 4. Mass Murder ....and probably much more.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? -death -kidney failure -gall stones -getting in an automobile accident -getting struck by lightning -getting sodomized -embezzlement -deception -HIV/AIDS -illness of any nature -world hunger -the holocaust -Zimbabwe's economy -getting hit by a train -getting hit by a bus -the hives -getting bit by an alligator -head injuries -being arrested -childhood obesity -sexual predators -highly impoverished areas -losing a finger -getting hit with a bat -corruption -general rudeness -being lost in the woods -contracting a sexually transmitted virus -teen pregnancy -murder -rape -robbery -going blind -losing a child -falling down a well -bestiality -identity fraud -massacres -racism -genocide -mental disabilities in children -bullying -food poisoning -stepping on a nail -eugenics -the mass murder, rape, and theft of the land from the Native people of America -forced assimilation -slavery -brain deteriorating illness -matricide -prostitution - accidentally repeating yourself -prostitution -domestic violence -animal cruelty -pollution -deforestation -global warming -losing your life savings -still birth -oppressive leaders -physical conflicts -world wars and other military conflict -the situation in Rwanda -Inequality in treatment of women in middle eastern countries -auto theft -tax evasion -terrorism -being diagnosed with cancer -clinical depression -prostitution -finding two worms in your apple

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- Are you thinking what I'm thinking B1? - No.

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What did America get on the 11th September? 9/11

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How many men does it take to screw a light bulb? One, men will screw anything.

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Jaden McMichael

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What is black and white and red all over? a nun that got raped.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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