Who graduated top of their class, got their degree two years early and lead a very successful life? Not you

A farmer had a horse that he rode frequently. He would talk to the horse and tell it it was his closest companion. One day the farmer noticed that the horse was walking funny. So he shot it.

A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The horse did not reply because he was incapable of speech.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was a metaphor.

Q: what do you call obama A:a dumbass

roses are red, violets are blue i couldnt spend one night without you

What's worse than stepping on a snail? Stepping on a bear trap.

Why did Sally drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus.

Why did Dom stop smoking He didnt I lied

Whats funnier than 24? 25

wsedrtyujiKFKJKLEFL;LKJRG Blame the economy. Don't hit me, I'm a girl! EQUAL RIGHTS, EQUAL RIGHTS!

The WNBA.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because it had no arms. Why did Little Timmy fall off of his bike? Because he was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator. Knock knock Who's there? Not Little Timmy.

A 12-year-old boy comes up to the Polish man and says, "I was looking in your bedroom window last night and I saw you and your wife doing it. Nyah, nyah, nyah!" The Pole answers, "You are a very rude, disrespectful, and inappropriate child. Where are your parents?"

Q.What has flashing lights and really bad dancing A.Baby haveing an eppilectic fit

What happened to truck full of watermelons careening down the hill? After panicking, the driver was able to gain composure, and shifting the truck into a lower gear, was able to deliver the track safely to the side of the road at the bottom of the ill, where he sat down alongside of the road under the shade of an apple tree, sucking on delicious watermelon.

Money is no object. Because I don't have any.

What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

What's the difference between a pen and a tiger? Believe it or not they are both not a cantaloupe.

Dead babies and disabled kids. Jews, mexicans and black people. Hitler and prostitutes. Sex sex sex sex sex.

How does a muslim make his parents proud? He gets good grades.

What's a fail with a bowl on its head, a 30 year old, and a 5 year old at the same time? Justin Beiber

Steven hawking walks into a bar. a.w j.p

donald................duck for president

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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